Well, here's my first post for the month. I'm gonna take a little time and write a bit about some of my current thoughts and such.
Right now I'm at a creative impasse. I feel the thoughts churning in my head but I'm having a hard time committing it to paper. I'd love to write a short story but the footing is difficult to establish. My poems have been keeping me at bay for now but I'm ready to start something grander. Hmm..well see, I need to vent some of this energy.
Ok, I sooo don't know what I want to do with my life. It seems I'm currently stuck in a rut. I have no real incentive right now to aspire to anything greater than I am right now and that's a sad situation to be in. What I really need to do is get my ass back in school. Call it a case of pride but I'm somewhat pessimistic about going back and not achieving what I think I should. I don't know if I'm ready for the commitment again and I don't want to put myself in the situation if I'm not going to be 100% devoted to it. Add that to the fact that I don't necessarily know what profession I'd like to do. God, why does this have to be soo freaking difficult? I'm envious of the people who know what their "calling" is. I've always had several different interests and an inability to be very decisive in this manner. I don't know what I'm waiting for. Perhaps a sign. How fanatical is that?
Well I'm at work and don't want to put myself in a mood so I'm going to distract myself with a game. Until I need to pour some more out...
Robert